Dreams of Darkness
by Sabishiioni
Summary: Prequel to Red Raphael is pushed too far.
1. I

Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT.

Warnings: Angst, Blood.

Mindless Babble:

* * *

"That's it, Mikey! I've had it with you and your stupid pranks!"

Michelangelo's laughter turned to a shriek of terror as his brother charged at him, his deadly sais aimed for his brother's heart. He managed to avoid Raphael's first lunge, but couldn't dodge as Raph twisted like a cat and threw a punch aimed for the younger ones head. There was a sickening crack and Mikey fell to the floor.

"Raphael! What did you do?" cried Donatello as he rushed to Mikey's side. He had heard the commotion and had wandered out of his room in time to see the sopping wet Raph attack his orange clad brother in the middle of their living room.

"He had it coming!" cried the 13 year old. "He keeps playing these stupid pranks just to piss me off!"

"Damn it, Raph!" Leonardo's blue bandanna tails fluttered as he brushed his brother aside. "Why can't you control your temper?"

"'Why can't I' Leo! It's his fault!"

Leo ignored him and knelt next to his purple clad brother. "How is he, Donnie?"

"Not good. He's bleeding."

Raphael felt something furry sweep past him. "Here is the first aid kit, Donatello."

Then Splinter turned on Raphael. The second eldest had been pushing his luck for some time now, and this was the last straw. When the turtle tried to defend himself, the old rat did something he had never done before. He struck his son across the face. Raphael was so shocked, he stumbled and fell. He looked up at his sensei. Splinter glared at him.

"You were trained to protect your brothers; not to kill them!" he growled, ignoring the fear that entered the young turtle's eyes.

"Master Splinter!" Donnie's terror filled voice caused Splinter to turn away from venting his fury. "Something's wrong!"

Raphael watched the rat move swiftly to his other sons. He saw the angered looks that his brothers threw at him before returning their attention to Mikey. He saw and felt the anger and hatred that radiated from the group of mutants. He touched his stinging cheeks and retreated to his room.

Sitting on his bed, the dark thoughts returned to taunt him. They had visited him almost every day for the past year. Today, they spoke with crystal clarity.

'They hate you. You were never meant to be their brother. You were meant to be alone. You bring nothing but Misery to those you love! You would have been better off never to have even been born!'

'It's true,' Raph whispered, as trails of tears made their way down his face. 'They hate me. And now I might've killed my baby brother, the one who might've actually loved me.'

He looked down at his hands and wasn't really surprised to find one of his kunai blades in his hands. He slowly traced a line in his hand with the tip of the throwing knife, drawing blood.

The voices returned, whispering into his ear, cutting into his heart. 'Do it, do it! They won't miss you! They will be better off without you! They will forget about you easily!'

Raph choked back a sob, hearing only truth in their words. "I know," he whispered.

He picked up the other three knives from the floor. He found a ball of string under his bed and was inspired. He cut four strands off and tied one to the loop on the hilt of each knife. Task completed, he took them and moved to the middle of his bed. He took each knife and laid them out in front of him. Mentally, he named each one. 'Splinter', the one that hurt the most, was the first to pierce the skin in the bend of the left arm, next to the heart. 'Leo', the one that came to the sharpest point, was plunged into his left wrist. 'Donnie', with it razor like edge, found its resting spot in the crook of his right arm. 'Mikey', saved for last, came to rest in the wrist of Raphael's right arm. With tears streaming down his cheeks, he silently said goodbye to his family. He picked up the four strings in his mouth and threw his head back, tearing the knives from his arms.

Anguish and sorrow guided Raphael into the darkness.


	2. II

Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT.

Warnings: Blood. Short.

Mindless Babble:

* * *

"Hey, Mikey. How ya doing?" Leo asked as his brother moaned. The blood had come from a small cut that had opened when Mikey had hit his head. It hadn't been too deep but it was a head wound and as such had bled profusely. They had moved the young turtle to his room where he would be more comfortable. Both he and Don had stayed with their youngest brother while Splinter cleaned up the blood from the floor.

"Ooohhh, did you get the plate of the truck that hit me?" Mikey asked, touching the bandage on the side of his head.

Leo laughed. "Yeah, R-a-p-h-1."

Mikey smiled. "I guess I got him really mad, huh? Where is the hothead anyway?"

"He's in his room, sulking, probably," Donnie said. "Why?"

Mikey shyly smiled. "I wanna apologize to him."

"What! Why? He almost killed you!" Leo exclaimed.

"Yeah, but I knew he was in a bad mood to start with." Mikey looked at his brothers sadly. "He just hasn't seemed himself lately and I wanted to try to make him laugh."

Both Leo and Donnie grew serious. Leo spoke first. "I know what you mean. It's like he's pulling away from us more and more each day."

"Now that you mention it, he has been spending a lot more time by himself lately," Donnie added.

"And he doesn't eat or sleep that much either," Mikey quietly put in.

"Maybe I should go find him," Leo said, standing up from the bed. "You know, to let him know that he didn't kill Mikey."

Leo walked into Raph's room to see his brother lying on his side on the bed, his shell facing the door. "Hey, Raph. Mikey's going to be okay and he's as..."

Leo had walked over to the bed and put his hand on Raph's shoulder. That was when he discovered something wasn't right. The skin was too cold. He rolled his brother onto his shell and stared in shock at what lay before him.

His brother was covered in a sheet of his own blood. His face was twisted into a mask of pain and something else. Four bloodied blades lay near his head, the strings that had been tied to them tangled and soaked in red.

"Raph Wha no," Leo stumbled away from the bed in shock. His young mind couldn't process what his eyes were seeing. "NO!"

His cry had alerted Splinter and he rushed in thinking that Raph was attacking Leo. Instead, he found a parents worst nightmare. Leo was backed up against the wall farthest from the bed, his eyes opened wide in shock. His other son lay seemingly lifeless on the bed. Raph's eyes were closed and his expression did nothing to ease the fear that clutched the rat's heart.

"Donatello!" Splinter called as he rushed to the bed. He ripped the sheets that were still bloodless into strips and began to bind his son's arms. The boy's chest barely rose. He felt another enter the room and without looking said, "Donatello, please take Leonardo back to Michelangelo's room. And stay there!"

Donnie nodded, not seeing what was going on because of Splinter's body. He quietly stepped over to where his brother sat. He noticed the eyes behind the blue mask were opened wide, seeing nothing but the horror he had witnessed.

"Come on, Leo. We need to go see how Mike's doing." The purple masked turtle gently took his brother's wrist and pulled him to a standing position. Leo stood like one in a trance. He stared at Splinter, seeing for the first time, his sensei.

"Raph?" he whispered, unable to form the question.

Splinter spared a moment to look over his shoulder at the brothers. Don was shocked at the terror in his teacher's face. "GO!"

Donnie jumped and pulled Leo from Raph's room and back into Mikey's. The orange masked turtle was sitting up, panic clearly written on his face. He opened his mouth but closed it at the look on Don's face.

As he sat Leo down on the bed next to Mikey, Donnie asked, "How would you guys like to play a game? We could play chess. You and Leo against me?"

Mike knew that look and sighed. He wouldn't get any answers until Splinter came back. "Okay, but I don't think Leo will be much help."

The eldest turtle looked up at his name. He had heard everything and knew that Donnie was doing the right thing, keeping every one distracted. "I'm better at strategy then you are, Mikey."

Donnie raised an eye ridge. He hadn't really expected a reaction from his brother right away. "So you accept the challenge?"

"It won't be much of a challenge. Mikey and I will kick your shell," Leo joked weakly.

Donnie managed a shaky smile. "You wish!'

"So I guess neither one of you is going to tell me why you're walking on eggshells or why Raph's not here."

Leo looked at Don but the other turtle hadn't seen anything so he just shrugged half-heartedly. "Not yet, Mikey. Wait until Master Splinter comes back."

Another sigh. "Okay, but Leo and I get to be white."

Donnie stared at him blankly. Mike pointed at the chess pieces. "White goes first, right?"


	3. III

Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT.

Warnings: Short, Tissue

Mindless Babble:

* * *

What seemed like an eternity for Splinter was actually less then two hours. It had taken that long to get the bleeding to completely stop. He laid his son on the couch. Raphael was so pale! Splinter finally allowed the feelings he had pushed to the back of his mind to surface. Sorrow and guilt dominated. How could he have struck his son like that?

Tears welled up in soft brown eyes as the graying rat went back into the room and stripped the bed of the scarlet stained sheets. A notebook caught his eye and he picked it up, quickly flipping through the pages. With a start, he realized that it was a diary. He set it aside for the time being and finished changing the sheets.

As he tucked Raphael under the extra blankets, being mindful of the heavily bandaged arms, he thought of the black notebook he had found. Collapsing into a chair next to his son, he open the book finding that it was indeed the rough scrawl of Raphael. Most of it was undecipherable but the aging rat did find a few passages that were legible.

_Master Splinter had me stay after lessons as punishment for being too rough on Don. When he finally let me go, I went to find my brothers. They had left the lair but I easily tracked them, thanks to the cookie crumb trail Mikey left behind. When I did catch up to them, I stayed hidden in the shadows. I was going to try and scare them, but then I heard their laughter. It was so different then when I was around them. It was lighter, more carefree. They were playing, having so much fun. Without me. I suddenly felt out of place, like I didn't belong, but I couldn't bear to leave. I wanted so much to be a part of that laughter but there was a voice whispering to me, telling me that I didn't belong. I knew the voice was right. And so, I stayed hidden, just watching, until Splinter called them back. Even then, I waited. Splinter came and found me, yelling at me for not coming when he called. He sent me to my room without dinner. I didn't really care. I wasn't hungry. All I could see was my brothers laughing and hearing the voice telling me that they didn't want me._

Splinter wiped away a tear. He remembered that day, so many weeks ago. At the time, the old rat thought Raphael was just being rebellious. His heart sank as he realized the truth. He flipped a few pages into the book and found another passage.

_I took a walk by myself today. The others were too busy. Leo was polishing his swords, Donnie was working on some new gizmo and Mikey was knee-deep in comic books. So I quietly left. I know it's better if I'm alone. That's the way it should be. I'm too different for the others. I was meant to be alone. I realized this. I just wish it didn't hurt so much. I try to not let that pain show and I pretend that everything is okay. It's just a mask, though. Pain and loneliness is all I seem to be able to feel lately. Why does it have to be like this! Why do I have to walk alone? Is there no one out there that can love a creature like me? A thing of darkness, a monster. No. No one can love something like that. They have each other, Master Splinter and the others. They don't need me. The voices keep telling me that they would never even miss me. I know that it's true. I wish for things that I can't have, feelings I'll never feel. Maybe I should have never come back from that walk. Would they realize that I was gone? Or would they just be happy that I wasn't there? Maybe I should end it. Go away forever_

Splinter looked up from the book, tears soaking his fur. How could he have missed the pain his son had been going through? A 'mask' perfected over months of feeling lost in his own world, rejected by those he cared about. A facade that he should never had to make. Near the end of the journal was one last legible entry.

_I met up with an old friend today. The big white croc that Leo and I faced a few years ago made an appearance. I was skateboarding along one of the tunnels not far from home. I'm not sure how he got so close, but I decided to make sure he didn't bother us again. He didn't go down without a fight though. One of his fangs caught me in the side before I was able to slam a broken pipe through its skull._

_I managed to push the body into the water which has been pretty deep from the melting snow. I made my way back to the lair. I was about to go into Splinter's room to ask for help when I heard their voices. Splinter and my brothers were reading a story about a samurai warrior who defeats an entire island of monsters. It's one of my favorites. I stopped at the door and listened for a while. After a few moments I turned and walked to my room. I guess I realized that I wouldn't be welcomed. Splinter and Leo would yell at me for being so careless and Mikey would feel sorry for the "poor" creature I killed. Donnie would just give me that look of pity I hate so much. Besides, they wouldn't care that I had been injured trying to protect them. They don't care about me. I know I love them and would do anything to protect them, but I don't think they would do the same for me._

_Lately it's been like that. I've been an outsider looking in on a happy family. And they do seem happier when they think I'm not around. .They don't see me when I hide in the shadows. It hurts to watch them sometimes, but then I feel like I deserve to be hurt like that. Pain, loneliness, 's all I can feel. They're the things that let me know that I am still alive and should do something about that. Someday, when I'm stronger, I will. My life is meant to be one of loneliness. My family has each other, they won't miss me. I wonder what it'd be like to be free. This life holds nothing but pain and sorrow._

Splinter closed the book and gazed down at his pale son. He thought deeply about what he had learned. Now he would have to face his other sons with this knowledge. He wondered how he was going to tell three 13 year olds that their brother just tried to leave them forever.


	4. IV

Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT

Warnings: Tissue

Mindless Babble:

* * *

The brothers were in the middle of their second game when Master Splinter entered the room. Three pairs of eyes looked up. Three sets of young voice asked the same question.

"How's Raph?"

Splinter sighed. He took the chess board and set it down on the floor next to the bed. He sat down and gathered his sons into a fierce hug. This only served to scare the turtles even more.

"Sensei?" Leo asked quietly.

Splinter suddenly found it very hard to talk around the lump that appeared in his throat. "My sons, Raphael has always been more akin to the shadows. Tonight that darkness tried to take him from us."

"Raph tried to kill himself." Splinter stared down in shock at the one he thought of as his eldest.

"NO! Raph wouldn't do that!" Mikey cried out. "He's stronger then that!"

"But when was the last time we told him that?" asked Donnie, quietly.

Splinter tried to keep the tears from falling. "Leonardo is correct, but Raphael will live if we help him."

"But what can we do?" Mikey was past the point of tears.

"We need to be there for him, even before he wakes up," came a whispered reply.

Splinter again found himself staring in awe of his blue clad son. Leo looked up at him, tears shining in eyes that held too much wisdom for one so young.

"May I go be with him?"

Splinter could only nod, the lump in his throat becoming to big to speak around.

* * *

Leo walked into his brother's room with a heavy heart. The last time he had entered, he had found Raphael near death. The fear of finding the same nearly overwhelmed the young turtle.

Leo slowly approached the bed and sat down on the edge of it. His breath caught when he saw the still form of his brother. In his mind's eye he saw his brother still bathed in his own blood. He blinked several times trying to dispel the frightening image. When he looked again, he simply saw his pale brother under thick, warm blankets. He reached out and brushed his brother's cheek.

"Oh, Raph! I'm so sorry! Master Splinter yelled at you for not protecting Mikey, but then I go and fail to protect you!" He let his head drop into his hands and the bitter tears of shame and loss fall. "I let you down."

"No, you didn't, Leo." The gentle voice was accompanied by a three fingered hand on his shoulder. Michelangelo looked at his brother with such compassion, Leo felt his heart break. "Raph pushed us away and when he wakes up, we'll find out why."

"But what if he doesn't wake up? What if... "

Leo was cut off by Mikey who was shaking his head as he said, "Don't say that! Raph will wake up and everything will get better! It has too!"

That broke Leo and he wrapped his arms around his youngest brother, allowing the rest of the tears to fall. Mikey stood there, quietly holding his brother. He would save his tears for a more personal time.

* * *

The clock on the nightstand read 9:35 pm and Donatello was almost finished with the story. He knew it was his brother's favorite and he didn't mind reading it aloud. He rather enjoyed it, himself.

"And then the oni king cried out, pleading with Momotaro to spare his life. Without his horns the evil ogre had no power "

Don looked up at the moan that had interrupted him. "Raph?"

He set the book down on the floor and scooted closer to his brother's head. The hours after Leo had found Raphael lying in a pool of his own blood had lengthened into days and those in turn had gone into weeks. Leo's guilt had caused him to give up long ago, though Michelangelo and Donatello still held a flicker of hope that their brother would return to them.

Another moan was accompanied by fluttering eyelids. Raphael's eyes slowly focused on Don's smiling features.

"I'm alive?" he managed to rasp out.

Don knew he wouldn't be able to wipe the smile off his face for a very long time. "Yeah, you're alive! Boy, ya gave us a scare! Wait 'till I tell "

"Why?'

Don looked at his brother, confused. "'Why' what? You're the one that tried to kill himself. You tell me!"

Raph weakly shook his head. "No, I meant, why am I still alive?"

The other turtle blinked in shock. "Because Leo and Master Splinter saved you."

An angry sigh emanated from the injured turtle. "Why did they bother?"

Don noticed, in the back of his mind, the fact that the smile he thought would take forever to wipe off was gone. "You're our brother! That's reason enough."

Raph turned away from his sibling. "So it was an obligation."

"What! No! We love you, Raph!" Don sighed in frustration. Why the shell was his brother being so stupid?

"Love?" Raph laughed softly. "Don't kid yourself, Don."

The other turtle's jaw dropped. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Unconditional love doesn't exist." Raph turned his head so he looked directly into Donatello's eyes. "Besides, how can anyone love something they hate?"

This conversation was spinning wildly out of control for the young turtle in purple. He was hurt and confused. "You think we actually hate you?"

Raphael sighed and closed his eyes. "I'm tired, Donny."

It didn't take a genius to see the double meaning in that statement. "Alright, I'll let you rest. But this conversation is not over."

"Whatever."

Donnie left his brother's side only after making sure he was truly asleep. He went into the kitchen to try and find something to clear the confusion that was clouding his usually lucid mind. What he found was master Splinter.

His master had been drinking tea at the small wooden table. One look at his sons face and he knew. He stood up and walked over to where Donatello stood trembling Kneeling, he pulled the young turtle into a strong embrace. One the child returned whole-heartedly.

"I I don't understand, Master Splinter," Donnie stammered out. "Why does Raph think we don't love him?"

"Perhaps he has been surrounded by the shadows for too long," Splinter gently replied.

"What shadows?"

"The ones surrounding his soul." Both Splinter and Don jumped at the sound of another's voice. Standing in the doorway was Leo who was holding Mikey's hand. The youngest turtle had tears streaming down his face, afraid of what his oldest brother had just said.

Splinter sighed and motioned for his other sons to join the hug. Mikey nearly threw himself into it. Leo more sedately walked over. Instead of curling up in his father's hug, he wrapped his arms around both his brothers and his mentor.

"Now that he's awake, we need to figure out a way to get rid of those shadows."


	5. V VI

Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT. I do not own "The Prophet".

Warnings: Sap

Mindless Babble:

* * *

Raphael slept through the night, waking early in the morning. To his surprise, he found Leo and Mikey on either side of him and Donnie at the foot of the bed. All three were sound asleep. Raph slowly sat up, trying not to wake his brothers. He looked at his arms and carefully unwrapped his left one. The skin had mended for the most part, but it would never fully heal. There would be scars that he would carry for the rest of his life; marks to remind him of his failure and dishonor. Tears, unbeckoned, came to his eyes.

"Why?" he whispered. "Why couldn't you just let me go?'

"Because we're selfish."

Raph's head whipped up to stare at his older brother. Leo still had his head on the pillow, but his eyes were opened wide. Shame kept Raphael from saying anything so Leo sat up and continued.

"I know that you probably won't believe me, but it is true. We do care about you!"

"I don't wanna imagine a world without my best friend in it," Mikey chimed in. He snuggled a little closer to his brother.

"I think, for once, Mikey speaks for us all," added Donnie. "You may be our brother, but you are also our friend."

Raph snorted. "Friendship is as much of a lie as love is! I'm not blind! You enjoy the times you don't have to be near me!"

Donnie, being the only one to have experienced Raph's line of thinking, was the only one able to respond. "Raph, we enjoy being with you but in the same heartbeat, we fear that dark side of you! We want to help, but you have to let us!"

Raph opened his mouth to respond, but then Splinter entered the room "Alright my sons, please go to your room and get some proper rest. I will stay with Raphael."

"Yes, Master Splinter," the three young voices said in unison. The rat watched as they filed out of the room. Then he took a seat on the edge of the bed. He reached out and took the arm that had no bandages on it. He looked at the wounds and nodded.

"The wounds seem to be healing well enough." Raphael looked away, embarrassment coloring his cheeks. Splinter smiled. "And the color seems to be returning to your face."

When Raphael refused to look at him, Splinter mover to the chair that sat by the young turtle's bed. He took an old and worn book from his gi. He opened it and flipped to a particular chapter. He looked at his son, who was snuggling down into the pile of blankets that cover the bed.

"Would you like me to read to you?" Splinter asked.

Raphael rolled over long enough to give his adopted father a scathing look. "I'm 13 years old. I don't think I need a bedtime story."

Splinter smiled, looking a bit embarrassed. "Of course, my son. Sometimes I forget how old you are. I am sorry."

The turtle shrugged and rolled back over, so his shell faced the rat. He lay perfectly still hoping that Splinter would think him asleep and maybe catch a nap himself. He didn't have long to wait. Soon the sounds of gentle snoring filled the room.

Raphael sat up and looked at the mutant that had raised him. The aging rat had his eyes closed and his chin rested on a steadily rising and falling chest. The book he had been reading rested on his lap, still opened to the chapter he had been reading. And that is what caught the eye of the young turtle.

At first glance, Raphael had thought that the book at been the story of Momotaro, the Peach Boy, the story Donatello had been reading when Raph first woke up. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be one of Master Splinter's personal books, the ones he kept in his own room. Raph deftly removed it from under his master's hand and read the title.

'The Prophet? This doesn't sound like something Splinter would read,' Raphael thought as he opened the book to where the rat had left off.

_"Then a woman said, speak to us of Joy and Sorrow._  
_And he answered:_  
_Your joy is your sorrow unmasked._  
_And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears._  
_And how else can it be?_  
_The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?_  
_And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?_  
_When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight._  
_Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."_  
_But I say unto you, they are inseparable._  
_Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed._  
_Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy._  
_Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced._  
_When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall."_

Raphael set the book on his bed and leaned back into the pillows to think about what he had read. He could feel the words speaking to him. They seemed to be drowning out the other voices back and for that, he was grateful.

"So, what did you think, my son?" Splinter asked opening his eyes.

Raphael turned to face his sensei. "I think you were faking sleep to get me to read that book."

"Curiosity is a trait that you share with you brothers," Splinter replied, his eyes glowing with humor. "Did you understand?"

The turtle looked to the ceiling. "I...I think so. But it still doesn't change the fact that I still hurt."

"No, it wouldn't. The pain you feel is from wounds on the heart that cannot heal unless you let them."

"But how do I do that? How can I change the way I feel!' Raph cried, the tears once again returning.

"By letting your brothers help you! By letting me help you! Let us back into your life." Splinter reached out to his son and was happily surprised to find a trembling turtle in his arms. "I am so sorry, Raphael."

That night, the five mutants slept somewhat peacefully, once again a strange and unique family.

* * *

VI Epilogue

Three years later, Raphael stood on the roof of a building staring out at the city. Even in the drenching rain, he could see the multitude of lights sparkling through the city. In a way, they reminded him of the stars that he couldn't see tonight.

"Hey, Raph, you coming? I'm freezing my shell off here!"

Raph glanced over his shoulder to call back to his brother, "You guys go ahead. I'll catch up."

Mikey gave him one of his 'you-are-absolutely-insane' looks before shrugging. "Okay. We'll meet you back at the lair."

Raphael nodded and waited for his brothers to leave. Once he was sure they were gone, he walked to the edge of the roof and looked down. It was a ten story drop. Even with all of his training, Raph knew he wouldn't survive the drop. It didn't matter, though.

"Your joy is your sorrow unmasked."

The wind seemed to whisper the words that had kept him safe that night. He understood them better now. The injuries he had endured at the knives of darkness had cut deep. He knew that even with his family at his side, even with the new-found friendships he had with April and Casey, those wounds would never be filled.

He took off his left wrist band and stared at the scar. He remembered Mikey loudly proclaiming that the bands made Raph look cool and he thought that they should all wear them. Mikey had known that Splinter had given the soft leather straps to Raph to cover the scars on his wrist as the elbow pads covered the ones on his arms. He had also known that his brother would be self-conscious about them, so he made a set for himself and the remaining two brothers. The memory made the red masked turtle smile. He slipped the band back on.

Raphael lifted his face to the sky, letting the rain wash away some of the pain that still plagued the turtle. Things had gotten better. He was the team's "secret weapon" (as Michelangelo called him) now, not the monster he had once deemed himself to be. He still had his moments but now, at least, he knew he could turn to his family.

Speaking of his family

Raphael turned and started after his brothers. If he didn't hurry, Mikey would eat all the pizza!

* * *

_Tiny note:_

_I didn't have loving siblings or caring parents in my dark times. I didn't even have a good friend to turn to. All I had was a tiny, ten month old ball of fluff who offered me her most prized possession, a pink toy mouse. She saved my life that day. And every day since. (Even if she does destroy my home every chance she gets.)_

_Now I have a favor to ask of each of you. Think of those people in your lives that really mean something to you and let them know that. It only takes a moment, and in that moment, you might help them more then you know. Thanks!_


End file.
